I had been thinking a lot about my communication skills. As every human being, I believe, I was quite awful at communicating. I feel as that should be guided a bit as we are learning to speak. Perhaps it was the fear of truly saying what I wanted, needed, the fear of expressing myself or not even knowing how to put my own feelings and thoughts in words; spoken words. Somehow I have always been pretty good at writing, yet when it came about having an important conversation, my system would shut down.
I truly wonder if that is what also happens to you, so if you will, I would love to read your comments. =)
Back to my thoughts. As a young child, I used art to express myself, being though drawing, poems, painting. My throat chakra was so closed that I truly had first no desire to say anything and second, it honestly scared the living crap out of me to say out loud what I was feeling, hence the hiding behind my art. As I continued to evolve in life, I began to realize that communicating was actually a really big deal, so I had to learn to do so.
Have you heard the “fake it till you make it” motto? Ya... that thing ... truly I don’t believe it works very well lol at least for me at times it didn’t. Even though I took a speech class and I went to architecture school having multiple presentations in front of a jury, I still didn’t know how to communicate. One thing, and of course keep in mind that this is my opinion based on my perception and the experience we call life, is to learn how to speak in public about a project or a theme, another one is to fully communicate. The communication I am referring to is the one from the heart.
How do we relate to others? How can we sit in a room with heavy energy and speak about what is bugging us? About being hurt? About our traumas? About our limited beliefs? About the human codes?
Well first of all, we must feel safe in the environment. Whoever is around must open a sacred space, if you will, to be able to listen with its totality. This includes a space free of judgment, fully engaged on what someone is sharing and an open heart. One must feel that even if “ugly” things come out, they will see them as how they are without feeling threatened by what has been said or previous actions. It is very important for that one who is listening not to interrupt as that might break the thought process of the one who is sharing. Last by not least, the most important thing is for both to feel unconditional love from one another, support, respect and honor.
When these points are put into action, a portal opens up. Of course that other things might come up to the surface. One might feel “attacked,” therefore explaining something with compassion is also a must. One must remember not to take things personally as one experience can be seen in completely different ways from different eyes.
The main thing about learning to communicate properly is that it gives us the big opportunity to expand further. This involves not only our personal self but also the entity that we are creating with someone else, whether is with a family member, a friend, or a partner.
I invite you to think about your throat chakra as a portal for Divinity to do its work through you. Even if you are not spiritual, think about a greater force, whether you wanna call it “The Greater You,” “The Best Version Of Yourself.” Now, think about this child like entity wanting to fully express his own experience through spoken words. Just like a kid, when they are super excited about the most simple things, this entity jumps up and down and skips sharing what for it has been one of the most beautiful things in existence. Have you ever seen a kid sharing something with you? With shiny eyes? With so much joy that is hard to keep in? Well that is how this entity operates. It is full of love and gratitude for everything that has been placed in front of it and all it wants to do is share it joyfully with the rest of the world.
Moments in life happen when this portal is pushed back whether is by force, choice or because one might feel cornered up. There is nothing wrong with that or any kind of judgement whatsoever, it is what it is. It is the human experience and no one is to blame. We came into this reality that had already set up rules of how to speak, how to communicate, how to express oneself, how to look like. So of course we will get caught up in this systematic way of living. However, even though this is a big code in the human existence, it is absolutely certain that one can break free from this suffering. Of course like anything else, it takes a lot of practice.
Let me ask you something. Would you speak up about your feelings, about what you think is not fair in your eyes, about your joys, about your experiences easier if there was not a fear of judgement? I can answer for myself. Of course. Absolutely. We must remember that even though yes we might have some codes operating in our system, it is our choice if we want to keep them or not. The first thing to break free from them is to have the awareness that they indeed exist. The second one is to love ourselves enough to give us the opportunity to experience joy. How do we even begin to do this? Simple enough, loving ourselves.
Love comes from acceptance. Love comes from forgiveness. Love comes from the biggest depth of our beings, where there is no judgement to anything we have experienced. At the same time, no judgement of what we see in the mirror. Everything is absolutely perfect how it is. It is very important to remember that there is only one You. So how can one tell you how to live your life, how to dress, how to speak if they are not you? Yes, they might shine some light to you, some guidance, but at the end of the day it is by your free will that you choose to accept the guidance of not.
Now, when you begin to understand that constant or minimal judgement actually infects your system, which spreads super fast, there is a shift that happens within. This shift shines awareness throughout your life experiences so you can be aware of your thoughts, words and actions more carefully. Of course, this is not super easy to accept. Keeping in mind that eventually it will not be as difficult can help you get through this. At the same time, ask yourself, “why are you doing this?.” Allow the answer to come without editing. I do it because I deeply love myself unconditionally and because I am worth living a life full of joy.
Take a deep breath whenever your operating system is about to go into shock. Sometimes awareness is not easy to take in. That doesn’t mean that you cannot do it. It is a process so be gentle with yourself. Going back to the throat chakra. When you continue with the practice written above, you begin to give permission to your own consciousness and system to understand and believe that it is beyond ok to express itself. Sure, at the beginning you might not be certain of how to say something, but the more you practice it, the more the channels open up, connecting your heart to your throat to your third eye, to your solar plexus and etc.
Look at your being as a system. When something is blocked or overworked, it wants a break, just like a computer. When something is not working properly, other parts in the system must work overtime to keep it going. There are times that is too much and it shuts down in a form of depression, addiction, etc. The opposite also happens. When it is functioning pretty well, there is joy all around you and you begin to see with the eyes of love. You begin to accept everyone how they are even if at any point in time, they had said mean things to you. That doesn’t even matter anymore because you know that beyond this so called existence, we all come from the same dot, we are all equal.
That being said allow me to ask you the following.
Would you give yourself a chance to experience joy
Would you give yourself a chance to live fully?
Would you step out of your comfort zone?
Would you stop hiding and allow yourself to fully experience who you truly are?
I do and I know most of you if not all also do as well. So this is me saying
“You got this!”
Because I truly believe in you.