The feeling of freedom as the wind caresses my face
The feeling of hOMe as my heart races
The feeling of security as my feet touch the ground
The warm feeling as the Sun kisses my third eye
The feeling of being alive as I run aimlessly in town
There are so many things in my mind, so many feelings that have come up since landing in this amazing city that was once my home: Vegas.
When I was younger, I used to be in the track and field team at school. First it was because a boy I liked was part of it as well (LOL I know), then it became more. It made me feel at ease, at peace. Since little I struggled to open up and talk about my world... let's be honest... it's not a normal one haha... what IS normal anyway?
So running moved all those feelings away and brought a magical spot where time stopped and the struggled ceased.
I stopped running when I moved to the States when I was 15 years old. When I think about that time... no wondered why my issues became more difficult lol I stopped doing everything I loved and went into hibernation mode. It took years to go back to running and still then, it wasn't a practice I kept up for all the health issues I had. It was at the beginning of this year, 2018, that running became part of my life again.
I was training for a Marathon I was doing with one of my besties Tanairi and because I was already going through so much; it gave me so much clarity. I already knew I was moving to Thailand, I had opened up to people I care deeply about and got shut down. I knew an intense change was coming and I was leaving a relationship I had been on for years. Shit was SOOO real and fear was creeping up.
So I ran and I ran and I ran, pretty much every morning. Even if I didn't want to or felt lazy, I still woke up, meditated and went for a run. I didn't make it easy; it wasn't a flat surface. It was hilly, as the path went up and down, yet it was Nature so I didn't mind. I listened to EDM and every time the beat dropped, I sprinted. The freedom it gave me was unreal. When my heart raced so much, I felt so alive. As the wind dance with my hair and caressed my cheeks I felt so held by Nature and the whispers of "You are ok, do not worry" came easily.
I kept it up until I moved to Thailand... to be completely honest, I didn't do much exercise while I was there because I had massive healings pretty much the entire time since arriving. My physical body couldn't take it and because I overworked my body while I was still in Vegas (I had to keep my mind occupied otherwise I was literally gonna go insane ), my body needed the rest.
The beautiful thing about it all is that the moment I arrived to Thailand, was the moment I tuned so deeply into ALL my bodies. The connection was the kind of gratitude and understanding. I know meow, when it's best to do something and when it's time to stop. I hear my body saying enough or let's do this. It's quite magical if you ask me
So, at this time in my life, with the overwhelming sensation of so many feelings coming up, of so many things I have to do, of endings that become new beginnings, running is the one thing that will keep my sanity in check HAHAHAHA simply because it takes me back to the present moment, it helps me tune in to my surroundings and my inner self, but most importantly, it reminds me how within the movement there is a stillness that feeds the Soul and that is a reminder of what a miracle being alive is.
Bless <3